Thanks, Pinterest

So, like a lot of people, I've gone bat-shit crazy over Pinterest. I got married in July, which means I've said "I got the idea for Pinterest" so many times its become a habit for me to say it anytime anyone compliments me for any reason. Luckily, most compliments I get come to ideas I got from Pinterest, so it works out. Cute hair? Great Recipe? Awesome Gift Idea? Yeah, That came from Pinterest.

Some ideas are better than others. Yesterday I decided to do the "Make your wedding invitation leftovers into a Christmas ornament" project-- which turned out not-awful, considering the end-result was meant to look like a bunch of cut up pieces of paper stuffed in a clear ball I got from Joann's Fabrics.

This was the inspiration:

This is what mine looked like:

See? That's not awful. Tacky as shit, but not awful. And that's what makes Pinterest great. It makes ordinary, lazy people feel like they can be crafty. Its like getting ideas for home decor out of a magazine, if that magazine was Highlights. 

I should have taken a picture of my attempt at reception art, which involved red string and nails... But it was terrible, so I destroyed it. They can't all be winners. 

I was dreaming of a White Christmas

My holiday season has always ended up being a blur. I don't think I have ever had a Christmas Eve that I've remembered in my entire adult life. I have never be able to contribute to any story that started with "Remember last Christmas when.." Because the answer is always flatly "No." I could try to blame it on Christmas magic; or me getting black-out drunk, but its neither. Its actually a very precise formula, one that sometimes involves no alcohol at all. See, its one part brand new Christmas Eve jammies, one part giant traditional Christmas Eve dinner, a heavy dose of a roaring fire, and a generous helping of my mother telling me to "eat, eaat!", and churning out endless amounts of cookies and sweet breads. Suddenly, I drink a thimble of eggnog and I'm out like a light.  

And now its time to sip Cosmopolitans and watch "White Christmas" with my mom until we pass out, six minutes from now. God Bless us, every one. 

Office Christmas Party

I didn't go to mine. I was encouraged to go, because it was open bar (still not completely sure what my co-workers meant by " What do you mean you're going?? You have to! Its open bar!"), but that was exactly the reason I didn't go.

Let me explain. Its not like I'm not easily persuaded by an open bar, or I don't like my co-workers, but sometimes you've got to make the right decision for the greater good. And being the youngest employee of an otherwise middle-aged company is hard. You've got a job to do- and not just your actual job- you've got a reputation to withhold. For starters, you're fun. And cool. And you can drink a ton and wake up the next day unscathed. And just because all those things are true- just because I can drink a ton- doesn't mean I can control myself afterwards.

Case and point: A friend of mine who also happens to be the youngest employee at his company, and yet despite efforts to prevent embarrassing work experiences, continues to attend office parties.

Last year, he went to his office Christmas party and after hitting the open bar, he commented to his boss that his credit card company was "Harder to get rid of than a dead hooker". So of course, this year, wasn't going to let that happen. .. Until the CEO of the company suggested they do shots.

Side note: Shots are every could-be-party-disaster's weakness. We can't say no. Sort of like how vampires can only enter your home if invited. If its offered, we've got to take it.

So, a few shots later, he's laughing and joking with his bosses, and his boss comments that he likes his hat. So he says "Yeah, a lot of people say it makes me look gay. But I figure it couldn't make me look any gayer than the gay sex does."

I'd be surprised if his girlfriend lets him go next year.